What Can Prayer Do For You?

When his world was crumbling and darkness was knocking at his door he turned to an ancient practice for help. 

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My heart drops when I receive the phone call.

The man who raised me was going to die from cancer and I wasn’t going to be there. I wasn’t going to able to give him a hug or say my final goodbye in person. I should have been prepared for the moment. I had known for several weeks that day would come, but it was obvious by my shock that I had been in denial.

Feeling emotionally and physically numb I listened as my grandmother shared sober details of my grandfather’s condition. Surprised to learn that he couldn’t talk anymore I realize that my last conversation was going to be one-sided. My eyes begin to drown in tears as it dawns on me that this would be the last contact I’d have with him.

Would he know how grateful I am for his sacrifice in raising me?

Would he know how much I loved him?

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I feel my emotions bubbling to the surface as I try to stay composed while talking with my grandfather for the last time. What do you tell someone who is about to die? I’m not sure what I said but I told him how important he was in my life. That I wouldn’t be the person I am today without his influence.

Throughout the one-sided conversation my stomach turned into knots as I failed to veil my emotions. I was relieved when my grandmother spoke into the phone and told me that they had to go. She relayed that it seemed as though he had heard me, but how could she be sure? Once I hung up the phone I burst into sobs. My wife did her best to console me as regret overwhelmed my soul.

Depression seemed to be knocking at the door as I felt my world crumbling. The darkness that I had hoped to leave in the past lurked patiently in the shadows preparing to attack.

What was I going to do?

In the past I would have allowed my self loathing to poison my mind. The “what if” and “should have” would have drowned out the legitimate reasons why I couldn’t be there for my grandpa. In reality I was at college in the middle of the semester pursuing my dreams of a higher education that he approved of. I had just moved from Hawaii to Utah and couldn’t afford to fly. This was my reality but those of you who’ve experienced the touch of depression know that reality isn’t at its foundation.

Depression can feel like alcohol that clouds your mind so that you can’t think straight, and if that was the case I was hammered. So there I lay in bed hoping to fall asleep, which was laughable because my mind was racing until I realized what had to be done. The one thing I could do to center myself.

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I knelt down next to my bed and prayed.

I poured out my soul to a higher power. The guilt I was holding onto was laid out for inspection. After sharing my thoughts and dehydrating myself I sat and waited for a feeling in my heart like something I had felt after pushing back the darkness the first time I battled with depression. So there I waited with a clear mind hoping for peace until it arrived as a warm embrace. A calm feeling that fell upon me as my mind for the first time felt at rest.

Later that night I would have a wonderful dream that gave me the chance to see my grandfather for the last time. I’m not sure how we met but I remember vividly seeing my grandfathers smile as I ran up and gave him a bear hug. I told him how much I cared and regretted not being there. He just held me and with a whisper told me that he’d be okay. I awoke in tears and with a overwhelming feeling of peace.

Whether or not my experience was real I can’t say, but I do know how I felt and after that night my outlook on his death had changed. The darkness that was creeping in had been replaced by the peace that comes after the burden of your guilt has been lifted.

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What does this mean?

Is prayer the formula in overcoming the onset of depression?

I’d say it could be but it’s not because of what you think. For those of you who are religious and believe in the power of prayer might see my change of heart as the Spirit of God working in my life, which as believer I don’t doubt. However, for those of you who may not believe in a higher being I’d like to help you understand the power of prayer in another way.

I’m a big believer in the concept that religious teachings have some basis in science. Spiritual teachings aren’t just for religious people but is a way of life that anyone can use to live a happier existence. In regards to the concept of prayer I believe there is some logical reasoning why we all should pray.

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1. Placebo effect

The placebo effect is when a person is affected by their beliefs. So if you believe a drug is supposed to help you feel better, your mind can create the presumed effects even if the drug you took was nothing more then a sugar pill. Therefore, if you believe praying can help you overcome the onset of depression then it’s possible that you’ll feel better after saying a prayer. Maybe that’s why Jesus said to a man he healed in Mark 10:52 “… Go thy way; thy faith hath made thee whole …”

2. Vent

For a lot of us we need to share how we’re feeling especially when we’re going through a hard time. When it comes to depression, people like myself tend to hold stuff in, which usually leads down a slippery slope. It’s important for us to share but sometimes it’s hard to find someone who’ll listen and understand. Plus it’s expensive to see a mental health counselor all the time. So prayer allows people like me to share my inner darkest thoughts without feeling judged and without it be magnified by the receivers reaction. Best part is that venting in a prayer guarantees your information will be kept confidential.

3. Connect with inner voice

Praying allows us to connect with our inner voice. It gives us the opportunity to sit in silence and in our day and age that is greatly needed. Without the outside noise we’re able to listen to our gut because in the end we know what’s best for us. When all the pressures of society is stripped away we know what we want. Mind you this only works if you pray and give opportunity for the spirit or your inner voice to speak up.

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These are the three reasons why I think anyone can benefit from prayer. You may not have to pray to a supreme being but you can speak to whomever you want. Maybe it’s your late father or it could be to your inner voice. Whatever the case may be we all can reap blessings from exercising the practice of sitting, speaking and listening to our soul.

So for those of you who struggle with depression I hope you find a way to keep yourself centered because life is like being on the ocean. There will be calm seas at one moment and then it will feel like the ocean wants to swallow you up. During those times I hope you turn to something you believe in and hold on to that. If you do you’ll be able to bounce back and face the day once more.

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Photo: Flickr/Connor Tarter

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